Midlife Musings February
Life Lately, Art of Healing, Ask A Therapist, Happenings
Welcome to the February edition of Midlife Musings!
I’m so honored to be back in your inbox to share this month’s dose of insight, encouragement, and a gentle reminder that midlife is a season of reinvention and self-discovery.
As mentioned in this welcome post, monthly I’ll offer reflections and inspiration tailored to this stage of life, plus weekly releases of the Tranquility du Jour Season 2 podcast where we’re exploring all things midlife—growth, creativity, wellness, and the art of living well. Pssst, yesterday’s was with Mama Wilson, have you heard it yet?!
Inside this month’s edition, you’ll find:
a regular peek into life lately
reflections on my word of the year, healing
an Ask A Therapist Q&A re: feeling overwhelmed
a variety of happenings to support your journey
AND a video playlist with nearly 70 videos
And now, let’s continue into our TWELFTH (one year!) edition of Midlife Musings. I’m delighted you’re here! Now, please settle in with a warm cup of tea, take a deep breath, and let’s dive in.
PS I hope you enjoyed your previous Midlife Musings newsletters and have a chance to peruse additional posts waiting for you here, too.
PPS Clicking the heart at the top or bottom of this email makes it easier for others to find Midlife Musings. 💗 Oh, and it also warms my heart! 💗 Please hit reply and let me know what’s resonating most.
Life Lately: A Peek Inside
Please join me in taking a pause to consider your own life lately: highlights, observations, and challenges.
What I’m working on:
Advanced Tranquility book proposal edits
Co-hosting a Pigs & Pugs event on National Pig Day (join us—in person or in spirit tickets HERE!)
Ways to enhance my paid Substack subscribers’ experience
What I’m loving:
Lover’s Leap tea by Smith (rose petal black tea = obsessed!)
Words that nourish—reading books filled with inspo, writing in my journal, and listening to someone reflect back to me what they’re hearing
Paris dreaming and preparation for a trip late March
What I’m consuming:
Watching Apple Cider Vingear
Doing my Duolingo French classes—now at 302 days!
Read The Vagus Nerve Reset by Anna Ferguson, Reading Stolen Focus: Why You Can’t Pay Attention—And How to Think Deeply Again by Johann Hari, Heal Your Nervous System by Dr. Linnea Passaler, and Brooke Shields Is Not Allowed to Get Old by Brooke Shields
What I’m wearing:
Soft bamboo TDJ textures that feel like a secure hug, topped with faux fur layers
This adorable market bag is my portable desk (now available in blush!) and often around my arm as I maneuver between home and office
These oversized reading glasses so I can actually see the fine print (and read a menu)
What I’m noticing:
How the light lingers just a bit longer in the evenings
The beauty of coming to the ballet barre to move, grow, and heal
My evolving relationship with healing (more shared below)
Your turn. What are you working on, loving, consuming, wearing, and noticing?
Gentle Art of Healing
Reflections on my word of the year, healing.
I’m finding that healing isn’t always grand or dramatic. It’s often slow, quiet, and deeply personal. Midlife invites us to approach healing in a new way—not as a checklist of things to fix, but as a practice of tending, softening, and allowing.
This has been on my mind a lot lately. Between a biopsy, grief, and the bittersweet reality of caring for an aging pug with mobility issues, I’m realizing that healing isn’t just about moving through hard moments—it’s about how we hold ourselves through them. It’s about choosing compassion over self-criticism, presence over pushing, and trust over trying to control everything (or anything, really).
Healing in midlife isn’t just about recovering from what’s past—it’s about creating space for what’s next! It’s acknowledging the ways our bodies, minds, and hearts have carried us through decades of love, loss, ambition, disappointment, and reinvention. It’s learning to listen to ourselves differently. Recognizing when we need to push forward and when we need to rest. And noticing when our nervous system is in a state of dysregulation.
Healing looks different for all of us, but here’s what I’m discovering:
✨ Healing is pausing. Taking time to breathe, stretch, and be—without rushing to the next thing.
✨ Healing is saying no. Setting boundaries that protect our energy and honor our needs.
✨ Healing is allowing joy. Letting ourselves laugh, create, and move with lightness even in uncertain times.
✨ Healing is trusting our wisdom. Knowing that midlife isn’t about losing ourselves—it’s about coming home to who we were always meant to be.
Right now, healing looks like showing up at the ballet barre after months of recovery, slowly working my way back into movement. It looks like drinking matcha in the morning, journaling when I feel untethered, and letting my body tell me what it needs. A nap, a nourishing meal (or dark chocolate bite), or a long walk. It’s also about letting go of old versions of myself—the ones that stayed small to keep the peace, the ones that believed rest had to be earned, the ones that tried to do it all.
And here’s the thing: healing doesn’t have to be lonely. It happens in connection, in deep conversations over tea, in shared laughter, in moments where we feel truly seen. It happens when we allow ourselves to receive care, not just give it—something I know so many of us struggle with. Healing is both an inward journey and an outward embrace.
I invite you to ask yourself: Where does healing want to happen in my life right now? Maybe it’s in the way you speak to yourself, the way you care for your body, or the way you hold space for your emotions. Maybe it’s simply in allowing yourself to be softer, to be held, to be enough just as you are.
Healing isn’t a destination—it’s a way of being. And midlife? It’s the perfect time to embrace it!
Ask A Therapist: Feeling Overwhelmed
Q: I'm in midlife and finding that stress and anxiety feel so much more intense than they used to. What are some practical ways to regulate my nervous system and find more ease in my nonstop daily life?
A: Ah, I see you! Midlife brings unique stressors—hormonal shifts, caregiving, career transitions, and the emotional weight of the world—all of which can leave our nervous system feeling overstimulated and on edge. The good news? There are gentle, effective ways to bring your body back into balance and cultivate more ease in your daily life. I’ve shared three favorites below.
1. Engage Your Senses
Sensory grounding techniques can quickly bring you back to center. Try:
Sipping a warm drink (matcha, herbal tea, or golden milk)
Lighting a candle with a soothing scent
Playing soft instrumental music or nature sounds
Massaging your hands with lotion to engage touch
2. Prioritize Deep Rest
Midlife calls for intentional restoration. Give yourself buffer time between obligations instead of jumping from one thing to the next. Take afternoon pauses, naps when needed, and gentle wind-down rituals in the evening (like reading, dimming lights, savasana, legs up the wall, a cup of chamomile tea, or a warm bath). Of course, quality sleep is one of the best nervous system healers!
3. Use Vagus Nerve Hacks
The vagus nerve is the key player in nervous system regulation and stimulating it can shift you into a more relaxed state. Try:
Humming, singing, or chanting (yes, even in the car or shower!)
Cold water splashes on your face
Box breathing (inhale for 4, hold for 4, exhale for 4, hold for 4)
Rhythmic movement like swaying, rocking, or even slow dancing
Grounding through your feet by walking barefoot on grass, sand, or a soft rug
If your nervous system feels constantly overstimulated, know that small, consistent practices can create real change. The goal isn’t to eliminate stress completely (impossible!), but to build resilience and find your own rhythms of rest and regulation.
Start with one or two of these practices and notice what helps you feel a little more ease, a little more grounded. Midlife is a time to care for yourself deeply, intentionally, and without guilt.
Happenings
A variety of in-person and virtual offerings
Year of Tranquility Digital Course
Tea with Kimberly Videos
An assortment of nourishing videos
In this Tea with Kimberly playlist, you’ll find nearly 70 videos designed to support you in welcoming the new year, practicing mindfulness, building your tranquility toolkit, and more!
Grab your journal, a cuppa tea, and be inspired to reflect this time of the year. You’ll find more Tea with Kimberly videos over on the Tranquility du Jour YouTube channel.
How I Can Support You
Tranquility Coterie yearlong program (waitlist)
Download a digital course and start learning today
Subscribe to my Private Substack Collection for more midlife tools
About Me
Hello! I'm a psychotherapist in Washington, DC, author of seven lifestyle books (next one on midlife), and host of the Tranquility Coterie. I’m in love with my 50s, ballet, pigs, pugs, and orangutans (random mix, I know!). I support women in finding more balance, beauty, and tranquility during this second half of life. More on my website and on Instagram.
A portion of all offerings support Pigs & Pugs Project, Borneo Orangutan Survival, and 1% for the Planet. Thank you for helping to make a difference!
All beautifully said! I’m looking forward to Pugs & Pints 😊